Today's Obsession

My baby, Zimba. I can't wait to get home and take a run with him! He can get on my nerves at times (He is always within a foot of my body, whether biting my ankles or sitting on my lap), but I wouldn't trade him for anything in the world. Even my parents love to hear about his crazy antics. This morning I couldn't sleep, so I woke Zimba up to go outside for a bathroom break. He thought I was going to let him sleep with me on the bed. I told him no and he gave me a dirty look before he crawled back into his crate like a sullen teenager.  Dogs have such great personalities!


P. Manolos

I Am Not My Hair...

India Aire touched many black women with this song. I have to keep in mind during my going back to natural phase that all of the painful shedding, hair cuts, and awkward hat days will bring me back to my glorious roots. Hopefully I'll end up with hair looking like this again:

Ah my beautiful fro! Another year and we will be reunited again. This time, I plan to keep you for life!


P. Manolos

Commentary: Jill Scott Talks Interracial Dating -

Commentary: Jill Scott Talks Interracial Dating -

Fantastic blog entry by Jill Scott. Although I am in an interracial relationship myself, I understand exactly where she is coming from. It's pretty deep and a good representation of how Black Women feel when they see black men dating white women:

You know the moment when you realize that fine, accomplished brother is with a White woman? Let’s call it “the wince.”
My new friend is handsome, African-American, intelligent and seemingly wealthy. He is an athlete, loves his momma, and is happily married to a White woman. I admit when I saw his wedding ring, I privately hoped. But something in me just knew he didn’t marry a sister. Although my guess hit the mark, when my friend told me his wife was indeed Caucasian, I felt my spirit…wince. I didn’t immediately understand it. My face read happy for you. My body showed no reaction to my inner pinch, but the sting was there, quiet like a mosquito under a summer dress.
Was I jealous? Did the reality of his relationship somehow diminish his soul’s credibility? The answer is not simple. One could easily dispel the wince as racist or separatist, but that’s not how I was brought up. I was reared in a Jehovah’s Witness household. I was taught that every man should be judged by his deeds and not his color, and I firmly stand where my grandmother left me. African people worldwide are known to be welcoming and open-minded. We share our culture sometimes to our own peril and most of us love the very notion of love. My position is that for women of color, this very common “wince” has solely to do with the African story in America.
When our people were enslaved, “Massa” placed his Caucasian woman on a pedestal. She was spoiled, revered and angelic, while the Black slave woman was overworked, beaten, raped and farmed out like cattle to be mated. She was nothing and neither was our Black man. As slavery died for the greater good of America, and the movement for equality sputtered to life, the White woman was on the cover of every American magazine. She was the dazzling jewel on every movie screen, the glory of every commercial and television show. She was unequivocally the standard of beauty for this country, firmly unattainable to anyone not of her race. We daughters of the dust were seen as ugly, nappy mammies, good for day work and unwanted children, while our men were thought to be thieving, sex-hungry animals with limited brain capacity.
We reflect on this awful past and recall that if a Black man even looked at a White woman, he would have been lynched, beaten, jailed or shot to death. In the midst of this, Black women and Black men struggled together, mourned together, starved together, braved the hoses and vicious police dogs and died untimely on southern back roads together. These harsh truths lead to what we really feel when we see a seemingly together brother with a Caucasian woman and their children. That feeling is betrayed. While we exert efforts to raise our sons and daughters to appreciate themselves and respect others, most of us end up doing this important work alone, with no fathers or like representatives, limited financial support (often court-enforced) and, on top of everything else, an empty bed. It’s frustrating and it hurts!
Our minds do understand that people of all races find genuine love in many places. We dig that the world is full of amazing options. But underneath, there is a bite, no matter the ointment, that has yet to stop burning. Some may find these thoughts to be hurtful. That is not my intent. I’m just sayin’.

Thought of the Day

One of my commitments this year was to cut back on spending. I'm trying to be more conservative in my old age- saving is a habit just as spending is a bad one, so the best thing to do is to give yourself a hard, critical look at how you spend money.

Yesterday, I took advantage of a "buy back" program of sorts, where you can sell your used clothing & shoes and receive cash. Most of the clothes I sold I never ever wore in the first place, and I ended up making a pretty good killing. It was so empowering to cut back and clean out my closet, that I had to restrain myself from selling everything, including the kitchen sink.

Financial Frenzy,

P. Manolos

Lesson Learned

I posted this song over a year ago. Unfortunately, the lyrics still speak to me today. I have found that life is the harshest teacher. She doesn't give extra credit and there are no do-overs. The lessons you learn are permanent and you can harbor as many regrets as you like, but none of them will get you anywhere but sorrow.

Lesson Learned by Alicia Keys
(feat. John Mayer)

He broke my heart
And now it's raining
Just to rub it in
I'm at your door
I feel so crazy about it
You'll say I told you so
You knew he had to go
I finally came 'round
I'm back on solid ground
Can't let it get me down

It's alright (x3)

Yes, I was burned but I called it a lesson learned
Mistake overturned 
So I called it a lesson learned
My soul has returned
So I call it a lesson learned

Another lesson learned

Some lies
Can take a minute
To fully realize
His tears
Your eyes
Thirty seconds to apologize
You give it one more chance
Just like the times before
But he already knows you'd give a hundred more
Until that night in bed
You wake up in a sweat 
You're racing to the door
Can't Take it Anymore


Life ain't perfect if you don't know what the struggle's for
Falling down ain't falling down unless you cry when you hit the floor
It's called the past cause I'm getting past
I ain't nothing like I was before
You oughta see me now.



Thought of the Day

Times Change.

When I was a kid, my oldest sister moved from Ohio to California to start her college years at a prestigious university. She had no real idea what was in store for her, she only enrolled because people would give an impressive sigh each time she said she got accepted to the school. Almost twenty years later, she is still out on the west coast, established in her career as a private small business owner. Throughout my childhood, my sister would come home for holidays, birthdays, and family vacations. I saw a different side of her each time I came home- she was so beautiful and glamorous. It was as if the California sun had changed her from a budding seedling into a full blown flower.

I too, went out to California to discover my own path in life. I grew up in a small, midwestern town where I had only one path available in my life-a mediocre one at best. Go to the college everyone goes to, then get married and have kids- or skip school altogether and just start having children. I was hurt so many times by so many people in my small community- my peers who were indifferent to who I was as an individual and their parents who raised them to incubate such negativity. I should thank each and everyone one of those individuals- I wouldn't have had the drive to leave the nest so badly if they hadn't given me a firm push in the behind.

I lived in California for five years.

California. For me it symbolizes freedom and growth- a place to figure out who I am and where I want my life to go. I was nurtured by a small-private school to think globally and now I find myself at a large public institution thinking solely about how I can impact the community around me.

Life. It is what it is I suppose. Who knows where else it will take me? All I know is that around this time next year, I may return to California to find myself once again.

Spring Renewal,

P. Manolos

TV Recap: The Bachelor- Why He Chose Her

I am a sucker for romance. So you can imagine how enthralled I was at the new Bachelor series with Jake Pavelka a.k.a the Pilot. "On the Wings of Love" was the subtitle for this year's Bachelor series and I must admit it was definitely a flying high favorite of mine this year.

Let me say this from the jump, I think all of the women on the show were absolute treasures! Many of my favorites were voted off early (Ella and eventually Gia).  All of them were wonderful women- but the point of the whole show is for Jake (not America) to find true love.

What I find more puzzling than his choice is the fact that so many people don't understand why Jake chose Vienna.

Why did Jake choose Vienna? Well, out of all the contestants, Vienna was the only one who didn't put Jake on the knight and shinning armor pedestal. Every time one of the girls spent time with him, they approached him from the viewpoint of Jake as the perfect man instead of Jake as just a man. You can imagine how difficult it is to get to know someone if you have to live up to their fantasies as the perfect man.

Why did Tenley lose? Well, because she was the perfect woman. We all loved Tenley because she was sweet, kind, and the type of girl any man would bring home to his parents. Jake was enthralled by Tenley precisely because of this, but he also fought with his own reality- he's not perfect.

Vienna was honest, real, and downright mean throughout the whole show. She was being herself. Jake, as reports from the tabloids are pouring in, isn't a perfect prince after all. Some stories are even stating that he has abused business funds in the past to romance ex-girlfriends.  There's speculation that he may even have had an affair with an ex-girlfriend after the show ended. After ABC pushed him on top of the perfect Pilot Prince pedestal, Jake has finally fallen from grace and he must feel some relief because he can now resume being himself.  Jake knew exactly what he was getting when he chose Vienna and for some men that is worth more than gold.

So my advice to all the women out there who don't understand why Jake decided to propose to Vienna? Just be yourself in every relationship you enter into. Your boyfriend may be your prince charming, but he is also probably a slacker/nerd/spoiled brat/farting/couch potato/ball scratcher who just wants to let his hair down and relax. It doesn't make him any less of a prince- it just makes him human.

On the Wings of Love,

P. Manolos

Ten Things: Spring

Top Ten List for Spring

  1. Flowers- My tulips are beginning to spring up from the ground. I love the pop of color they bring each year without any effort on my part. 
  2. Stone Fruits- Strawberries and other stone fruits will be in season soon. I can't wait to bake up some amazing desserts with them!
  3. Weather- I love the balance between cool and warm. Fall is definitely another favorite season just for this reason. 
  4. End of Law School- Another year is finished as soon as May rolls around.
  5. Cinco De Mayo- I love Mexican culture, I'm hoping to celebrate this year since my finals will be over by the time the fifth comes around.
  6. Running with Zimba- Zimba and I have both gained a few pounds due to the cold winter weather. We're running outside again on a daily basis.
  7. Spring Break- A much needed week off from school to rejuvenate and reconnect with the real world.
  8. Mom's 60th Birthday- I'm baking a huge birthday cake for her. She specially ordered a chocolate cake so I'm hoping to throw together a large cake Ace of Cakes style. 
  9. Soft afternoon rain- The best time to curl up on the couch with the puppy and watch movies.
  10. May 17, 2010- My birthday! And no, I won't tell you how old I will be!
I need to stop procrastinating. Only a few more weeks until my birthday. Four days until I'm on Spring Break.

Picture of the Day

I made this beauty for the Law School baking contest. Yes, I won :)


P. Manolos

Up in the Gym Just Workin' On My Fitness

Warm weather has finally arrived in the Midwest. It's been a long winter and you can tell by the eager undergrads in flip flops and the sea of "jhorts" (jean shorts) that spring has finally arrived.

With the arrival with spring comes the realization that you have packed on plenty of weight during the winter. I think it's only natural since our prehistoric ancestors didn't have the luxury of running to Macys to buy a fur coat when it got cold.

So I too, like the prehistoric divas before me have gained a few pounds during the winter. Not to mention the mandatory "love chub" we all get once we settle down into stable relationships. I've started running again and have attempted to reign in my runaway diet. Not soon enough, unfortunately, for Spring Break in CA next week. 

So here's my list of fitness and diet commitments I plan to make this spring/summer to keep myself on the right track.

  1. Exercise 5 days a week. Zimba and I love to go for jogs, so I have the added incentive of getting him some exercise. 
  2. No pop. I usually don't drink pop anyways but definitely make sure that never gets back into my diet again.
  3. Eating Breakfast daily- Eating breakfast is a great way to cut down on binge eating during lunch to catch up. I find that I'm usually starving and ready to eat horribly if I don't take time to eat lunch.
  4. Less Sugar- I'm trying to drink coffee without sugar and cream- both add unnecessary calories
  5. Staying flexible- I'm trying not to punish myself too much for going astray every once in a while.

7 Days 'Til Paradise,

P. Manolos

Thought of the Day

Debating on whether to go out tonight or stay in the house. There's a bar review and I love to go and hang out with my IPC friends and meet new people. However, I may want to just stay home and relax- catch up on shows and play with the puppy.

Hmmmm.. whatever to do!

Party Mood,

P. Manolos

Obsesssion of the Day

Countdown begins. 16 days til fun in the sun in CA. I didn't know I needed a break so badly until now!

Ready to Break for It,

P. Manolos!

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