Picture of the Day

Thirty dollars can get you this huge Ice Cream Sunday. Sigh, It looks so delicious and to think I didn't go to Girhadelli Chocolate factory while I was out in San Francisco this weekend.

Sweet Tooth,

P. Manolos


Whoa, what the hell?

That's all I could think of last night as I drove home from the night that was essentially from hell. In between my heart racing and my blood pressure pounding, I couldn't help but think that I had finally had enough of being invalidated.

Yes. Kind of like when you go the the store and your coupon expires. According to the store clerk, your coupon has expired due to some justifiable reason, whether it be the fact that it's past the redeem by date, or if it's just a competitor coupon you had no business bringing to them in the first place. The only problem with that analogy is feelings are something intangible and have no value to know one except its possessor.

Well, last night, someone told me all of my life experiences were invalid. I should have seen it coming, I've had skirmishes with theml before, but to have it culminate into a scream fest wasn't something I had on the radar. The whole conversation consisted of the words "judge" and "minor" and "better or worse".

We all have painful life experiences. They can range from a myriad of things - whether it be the mundane falling of a bicycle, or something serious like violence or other forms of physical pain. What we must realize is that no matter what those events may be- they are still painful, life changing events and the pain that someone feels from those events should not be belittled. Yes, we can say we faced worse- but why would you tell another human being that their pain isn't worthy of recognition? Why do we constantly sit and decide who should feel bad and who should feel less bad about something. Here's an even more damning question I suppose, why do we feel qualified to do so?

I drove off in a screaming, crying huff. I screamed because the pain that I felt inside was coming out from every part of my body. This pain was real and no matter what someone else says, I deserve to have it validated and felt. Hot tears streamed down my face because I had allowed someone to get close enough to me to hurt me again. I don't believe in judging the life experiences of others. I know how painful it is to have someone analyze your life and tell you that what you think and feel is worthless. God tells us in the Bible that if we so choose to judge others, we ourselves will be judged more harshly. Yes, there are times where I will slip and think what the hell is wrong with this person? When I find myself in that position, I stop myself and think "what the hell is wrong with me that I think I am qualified to decide if there is anything wrong?"

Don't be the Judge,

P. Manolos

Say A Little Prayer for You

A friend sent this to me. I don't think I will get married, so imagine my surprise when I teared up a bit reading this. I think God has chosen a different path for me in my life. A solitary one.

A Prayer for my Future Husband

Lord God, your Word declares that if I delight myself in you—if I
enjoy and seek your pleasure above mine—you'll give me the desires of
my heart (Psalm 37:4). Desiring a husband is neither evil nor selfish
because marriage is honorable (Hebrews 13:4). At the beginning of
creation, you proclaimed, "It is not good that man should be alone"
and then you created Eve to be a suitable partner for Adam (Genesis
2:18). In the name of Jesus, I ask that you would protect the
husband—a suitable partner—you have chosen for me. Because the
covenant of marriage is sacred (Mark 10:9), I ask for a man of God.
Please give me a husband whose love for me is only outmatched by his
love for you; a man who will cherish me and build me up (Proverbs
31:28); a man who will honor me (I Peter 3:7) and our marriage vows; a
man who will be a good father and provider; a man whom I will be
attracted to physically, emotionally, and spiritually; a man who will
love me as Christ loved the church (Ephesians 5:25). Keep me from
attaching myself to another man out of desperation. I will not settle
for a relationship that's second best, convenient, or one that feeds
my insecurities. Guard my purity and give me the patience to wait. And
when I meet him, confirm to me that he is the one. Release from me the
baggage of past relationships, and prepare m e for the man You have
chosen to be my husband. Free me from any hindrances to a healthy and
godly marriage: insecurities, habitual sins, selfishness, and
emotional hurts. Dispel my unrealistic expectations that set me up for
disappointment. I place my trust in you rather than my partner. In
this period of waiting, I will look to you alone to be my companion
and best friend. You are the one who redeems my life from the pit, who
crowns me with love and compassion, who satisfies my desires with good
things (Psalm 103:4-5). I will not be anxious, but as I present my
requests to you, flood me with the peace that surpasses all
understanding so my heart and my mind are guarded in Christ Jesus
(Philippians 4:6,7). In this request, I commit myself to trust you and
do good, to dwell in the land and feed on your faithfulness. I commit
my way to you and trust that you will bring it to pass (Psalm 37:35).
(author unknown)

Today's Obsession

NO. no. NO. NO.

I feel sorry for the poor girl who thought this would be a good investment piece for the fall season. Ladies, just stay away from anything that makes you look like you killed a small, furry animal.

P. Manolos

Picture of the Day

Life is almost as blurry as this photograph I took last weekend. I'm in my second week of school and I feel like this year was even worse than last year. Instead of being overwhelmed by new ideas, I'm sunk by all the work I have to do. I have no clue how this year will turn out.


P. Manolos

Quote of the Day

"Guts are important. Your guts are what digest things. But it is your brains that tell you which things to swallow and which not to swallow" Austin Dacey.

I'm in the midst of a huge paper due in Appellate Advocacy. I'm also working on my journal acc check. Not to mention all the other classes I have work for. Oh boy, my puppy isn't going to be too happy with me the next few days. He was crying hysterically when I left for school this morning. Wednesday will be the worst for him, I have four classes and won't be able to come home in between them.

Picture of the Day

Law school has begun. Frankly, I'm not prepared for this year at all. I still have books yet to obtain and assignments to read. As I type, Zimba is cheerfully chewing his bone in his bed. He knows that he has to play alone when I sit in the war room. I am pulling articles for my accuracy check right now.

Picture of the Day

My little man, Zimba. He's really grown since I first got him three and a half weeks ago. (he went from 3 to 4.7 lbs) Nowadays, he's scratching at the door to let me know he has to go outside. I never thought I would feel proud of a puppy taking a dump on my backyard lawn. I also didn't think I would fall so in love with my tiny little pup. I often laugh at people who think he's super small because I never noticed, he seems larger than life to me. He's got a great personality and he's full of energy.

Law Review

I made it.

I realize now that I'm a workaholic. I can spend 10 hours in front of a computer working and think nothing of it. In fact, being at this pageant all weekend has made me crave working even more. I hate idleness. I hate sitting around doing nothing. After working billable hours during the summer, I have become absolutely obsessed with time. I am more discerning about how much time I spend on work and people.

My obsession with time is a blessing and a curse. It is a blessing because I am more aware of how I spend my time and invest it according to importance. It is a curse because I know people who live outside of my profession don't understand how I could spend so much time working. I guess the misunderstanding is mutual because I can't understand why outsiders spend so much time not working.

I don't have time to talk about time,

P. Manolos

Picture of the Day

My little man. He slept on my lap during the movie tonight. Who knew love from a four legged friend could be so pure and fulfilling?

Sleeping Beauty,

P. Manolos

Today's Obsession

Dolce & Gabanna Leopard Print Platform pumps. Half the price of a pair of New Christian Louboutin platform heels. Only difference? The label. Only problem? I still want the Christian Louboutin platforms. I'm on a quest to find a pair priced around $400.00. 

Today's Obsession

Let's be frank here. When it comes to finances, I believe in spending more on less. We're all going to die and our savings accounts can't come with us so why not live life to the fullest? I'd rather eat spaghetti for a week than wear knock offs, therefore the must have Chanel sunglasses with rows of pearl agate on the side is my must have of the season. I plan to purchase a pair as soon as my last firm check comes in this week.  I dare not say how much it costs. 

CHANELling my inner Jackie O,

P. Manolos

The Thing

I got a bit of a shocker last night. I was trolling on facebook as I usually do when one of my friends left a comment on my page about my competition preparation. I clicked on his page to return the comment when to my utter disbelief I saw that his status had changed from absolutely nothing to  "In a Relationship with XYZ". 

No big deal right? Well, the only thing is a little under one year ago, I had a crush on this guy. I thought I had correctly read all of the signs he gave me and put myself out there asking him if he liked me too. He said  I was attractive, but no, he wasn't interested in a relationship and definitely not one in the circle we ran in. 

So I was a bit crushed at first. I avoided contact with him only to find myself seeing Mr. Passion. After Mr. Passion crushed ever fiber of my being Casper came back to support me as I mended a broken heart. It was only this summer when he announced to me his strong feelings for a girl that he had only known for a couple of weeks and how he would do whatever it takes to get into a relationship with her.  I didn't believe him, after all he was known for his status as a huge player and for a fear of commitment. He slept with a different woman each week and didn't find anything wrong with his adversity towards love and commitment. You can imagine my jaw drop when I saw that his status had changed. I didn't know what was worse, the fact that someone who didn't really want a relationship had fallen into one so easily or the fact that I wasn't a compelling enough to be the one who changed his mind.

One caveat-  I don't have any feelings for Casper at all anymore. I'm very happy with our friendship. I am, however, confused and left in a daze. So many failed relationships in the past year. My five year relationship with Mr. Safety, my few month relationship with Mr. Passion (who btw is still with his girlfriend of a couple of months) , my short stint with Mr. Bland ( a guy so blah he can't even decide if he wants to be with me or not) and let's not forget Mr. Impossible who after a few dates has left the scene of the crime altogether.

A pattern is  a reliable sample of traits, acts, tendencies, or other observable characteristics of a person, group, or institution ( courtesy of Webster's Dictionary). As children we learned in math class how to discern numeric patterns and categorize them by their similarities. If you say 2, 4, 6, 8 and were asked what should come next, you should respond "10" because the pattern consists of even numbers or an increase by two. 

Had my dating life become a pattern of unsuccessful relationships? Each one relates to the other by failure, and the lack of something that a man needs in order to commit. I find myself at a loss for words when I realize that so many women find themselves effortlessly in fulfilling relationships while I hope that he will at least be kind enough to call me at the end of the day. All of the negative feed back and leaves me to conclude that there is a thing that I lack that most women are born with. 

The "Thing"

That thing that makes something click in a guys head and makes him want to be with her. That thing that makes him think about her every second of the day and gives him the sinking feeling when she doesn't respond to his phone calls or his emails. That yearning and desire they have to nest near them and be a part of their lives- to support them in bad times and celebrate the good.

If we are all made in God's image, then did he forget to install something before I came out of the womb? What is it about me that insures an endless pattern of unfulfilling relationships, heart break, and mind numbing lonliness? Am I broken or did I not enter this world without the thing in the first place?

Well, I'm off to the movies. My sweet puppy, Zimba, is passed out next to me. I hate to wake him up to go for a walk but I want to make sure he has all his needs met before I leave for the evening. God knows I wish I had someone to do the same for me.

SomeTHING is missing,

P. Manolos

The Perfect Man

I had no clue how compatible Zimba and I were until I conducted a little research....

  1. Miniature Pinshcers (a.k.a minpin) are known as the single person's dog. They stay loyal to only one or two people in their entire lifetime.
  2. Min pins are full of character
  3. Min pins are stubborn
  4. Min pins respect authority- any lapse in authority and they will take over as leader of the pack over their masters
  5. Min pins are loving

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